


I'm Not Worth It (Don't You See How Much You Mean To Me?)

by PossiblyAwesomeAO3



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: M/M, Text Format, shamchat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-17
Updated: 2017-04-17
Packaged: 2018-10-19 23:13:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,373
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10650075
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PossiblyAwesomeAO3/pseuds/PossiblyAwesomeAO3
Summary: Lance finds Keith wandering around the castle late at night, when he's supposed to be resting after taking a missile to the chest in their last battle.And Lance doesn't understand why he'd do something like that to save him.





	I'm Not Worth It (Don't You See How Much You Mean To Me?)

**Author's Note:**

> ALRIGHT SO HERE'S THE DEAL
> 
> I was messing around on the glorious website known as Shamchat the other day as Lance, and I stumbled across a Keith. Completely on the fly, we made up this entire story over the course of three hours. However, they left before we could truly finish it. This version on AO3 is going to be written down exactly as it was written over Shamchat, with some exceptions on the formatting. 
> 
> I just really liked how this came out, and figured that it'd be cool to share with the internet :)

**Lance McClain** : Keith?

 **Keith Kogane** : D'you need something?

 **Lance McClain** : Uh, no, I was just surprised to see you up already. 

 **Lance McClain** : You took a pretty hard hit after yesterday's fight, I figured you'd be out for a while. 

 **Keith Kogane** : ...No. I just wanted to be up and moving as fast as possible, I guess. 

 **Lance McClain** : Wait, did you not get Allura's permission to be up and going?

 **Lance McClain** : Ohhhhhhh, she's gonna be so pissed, dude.

 **Keith Kogane** : I don't need permission to stretch my legs a little. 

 **Lance McClain** : Dude. You took a missile. To the chest. I'm pretty sure Allura wants you in bed rest for at least a few more hours. 

 **Lance McClain** : And not just her, we all want you to be alright, man. 

 **Keith Kogane** : Walking around a little doesn't require my chest, Lance. I'm fine. I wouldn't be out of bed if I didn't think it was a good idea. 

 **Lance McClain** : Still! It's a fucking MISSILE, dude. 

 **Lance McClain** : I'm honestly surprised you're even ALIVE.

 **Keith Kogane** : Stop stressing out, God. I'll go back if it starts to hurt, does that appease you?

 **Lance McClain** : Look, you may be a pain in the ass, but that doesn't mean I like to see you end up pushing yourself too far and getting hurt, mullet. 

 **Keith Kogane** : _Please_. Understand that I feel fine. And if anything drastic does happen, then just hit me with an 'I told you so', right? ...Is there a chair nearby? Not to sit, I just need to lean a little on something.

 **Lance McClain** : (sighs) You're relentless. (He holds out his arm.) Here, just hold on to me if you feel like you're gonna pass out, or something. 

 **Keith Kogane** : (Wordlessly, Keith takes his arm, leaning a decent amount of weight into the gesture.) Ah...I'm not gonna pass out, but thank you. 

 **Lance McClain** : Don't jinx yourself, Kogane. It's no problem. 

 **Keith Kogane** : I'd knock on wood, but there's not really an abundance of that here. Ah...when's the last time I ate?

 **Lance McClain** : (shrugs) I have no idea. Probably before the fight yesterday? (Sudden realization.) Oh, quiznack. I'm taking you to the kitchen, now. 

 **Keith Kogane** : Good. I'm starving. How long have I been sleeping for, do you think?

 **Lance McClain** : Ah, geez. I don't know, about eight hours or so? It's like 3 AM right now. 

 **Keith Kogane** : Then why the fuck are you awake?

 **Lance McClain** : Uh... I _might_ have tried to figure out a way to make an energy drink with Hunk earlier? Good news: it works. Bad news: I went three hours without blinking. 

 **Keith Kogane** : That's... (He pauses, starting to chuckle at first, before grimacing in pain.) Well, those both sound like pros to me. 

 **Lance McClain** : Yeah, it sounds like a pro until you're so hyped up you're pretty sure you've entered the sixth dimension. I'm still not sure if the giant bear with unicorn wings was a hallucination or not. (He notices Keith's grimace.) Hey, you alright?

 **Keith Kogane** : Yeah, yeah. I'm fine. I just breathed too deeply or something, my chest just feels...hurts. 

 **Lance McClain** : Told you so. Hang in there, man. Once you get some good old space goo into you, you'll feel better. 

 **Keith Kogane** : Shut up, this doesn't count as drastic. Show your concern by getting me food. 

 **Lance McClain** : (smirks a little) I'm counting it as drastic when the great Keith Kogane, top fighter pilot and brooding mysterious bad boy of the Garrison, is relying on me to keep him alive. 

 **Keith Kogane** : The only thing that can be considered drastic right now is how thin you're stretching your necessity to this situation. I can damn well walk on my own. 

 **Lance McClain** : You want me to let go, mullet? 'Cause I will. 

 **Keith Kogane** : Alright, then. Go ahead. 

 **Lance McClain** : Fine. (He lets go, and starts walking towards the kitchen.) I'll get you some space goo, and if you're not there in five minutes, I'll assume you're dead and I'll make sure they play something by one of your emo bands at your funeral. 

 **Keith Kogane** : (Ever stubborn, Keith continues to stagger along as he had prior to using Lance as a support, although his pace is still abundantly slower than the other's.) Please also make my funeral the place where Allura publicly royally whoops your ass. 

 **Lance McClain** : You're the one who refused to go back to bed, Kogane! I'll pin the blame on your corpse before I let it fall to me! (He turns around, watching Keith struggle, with a knowing look on his face.)

 **Keith Kogane** : (He hums in acknowledgement, although finds himself having to pause, suddenly far more breathless than he should be for walking such a short distance.) ...Ugh, go ahead. Give me a minute, I just need to breathe. 

 **Lance McClain** : (A look of sudden concern spreads over his face.) Okay, for real. No more games, just admit you need some help, Keith. You're paler than Pidge after she spends three days in her room with the doors locked and her computer as the only light source. 

 **Keith Kogane** : I'm...I'm fine, just short of breath. Still hungry, though. Can't you hurry up and get me that goo, at least? I'll be there in a minute. 

 **Lance McClain** : Ugh. You're so damn stubborn. (He walks over, taking Keith's arm and slinging it over his shoulder, attempting to support him.) We both know I'm not going to actually leave you alone and wheezing in this hallway. 

 **Keith Kogane** : Hmph. I'd hope you would, if it were to get me food. (Despite his words, he leans heavily into Lance this time, although still grimacing.) Lead the way, then. 

 **Lance McClain** : (nods) Come on, Kogane. Let's get you to the space goo. (He walks slowly and steadily, trying to keep his natural bounce when he walks at a minimum to keep from hurting Keith.) I hope you know that if Shiro or Allura find out that you're out of bed and I'm helping you, we'll be dead men before the sunrise. 

 **Keith Kogane** : Well. One of us is already halfway there, and the other one of us is a dumbass. So I guess we can't say we didn't have it coming. (Given that laughing is too painful at this point, keith opts for smirking in amusement at himself, although his head was low enough that it was hard to tell.) Think they'll go easy on me for being injured?

 **Lance McClain** : I doubt it. There's no stopping either of them once they're in full 'parent mode'. (His smile disappears as he fully realizes what Keith had said at the beginning.) But don't talk like that. You just gotta' hang in there a little longer until Coran and Pidge get the healing pods up and running again. You better not go and die on me, mullet. Not after everything. 

 **Keith Kogane** : Yeah, yeah. I'll keep my life in check or whatever, Lance. If anything, I'm good at taking care of myself. (There seems to be no irony in his words, which, quite frankly, just makes him look stupid.) I think my chances of dying would decrease greatly if I had food, though. Chop chop, I can move a little faster than this. 

 **Lance McClain** : Right, because jumping in front of a fucking missile is definitely something I'd put in the definition of 'taking care of yourself'. (rolls his eyes) And hold your horses, we're almost there anyway. (They finally cross over the threshold to the kitchen, and Lance carefully helps Keith make his way over to a chair.)

 **Keith Kogane** : Shut up. At least I was doing something important, Mr. 'I made an energy drink and then didn't blink for three hours.' (Once they make it to the chair, Keith begins to hoist himself into it with one hand, and shooing Lance away with the other.) I got it from here, thanks.

 **Lance McClain** : Alright, alright. (He backs up a bit, hands raised in mock surrender as Keith finally manages to get into the chair. Lance goes over to the kitchen cabinets, looking for a bowl.) And anyways, it wasn't that important, man. You should've just let the stupid thing hit me. I would've been fine. 

 **Keith Kogane** : Don't be stupid...although, in retrospect, that might be difficult for you to comprehend. But if it did this to me, it could've damn well done worse to you, y'know? ...We're a team. We have to look out for each other.

 **Lance McClain** : (hesitates) Yeah. (He pulls a bowl from the cabinet, walking over to the goo dispenser.) Just...promise me you won't do something like that again. We can't afford to lose you, Keith, you're the best pilot we've got. And if you died because I got careless, I... (He stops for a second, unsure how to continue. he sighs.) _Fuck_ , man, just don't put me in that situation. Please. 

 **Keith Kogane** : ...I understand. You weren't being careless though, Lance. You were just preoccupied, and no one can really be blamed for that. But...in this situation, I don't think you should be wondering about what could have happened. 'Cause it didn't. We're both here, alive, and well...ish. (He leans over the counter, supporting the weight of his upper half with his elbows.) Can't promise you anything. But I can swear to God I won't die any time soon. 

 **Lance McClain** : (Lance covers his face with his hand.) But that's the thing. You almost did today. You almost fucking died today, and if Shiro hadn't managed to fend them off while we got you out of there...you would have. You almost died because you jumped in front of a fucking missile to save _me_. I'm not worth risking your life, Keith, I'm just...I'm just not. 

 **Keith Kogane** : But I didn't die. I'm right here, flesh n' blood, right? So, quite frankly, I dub 'but you might have' complete bullshit. And of course you're worth risking my life for, Lance. If not you, then what? Then who? I wouldn't be able to live with myself right now if I'd watched you get blown to pieces while I had the most obvious opportunity to stop it! 

 **Lance McClain** : (raising his voice) Why? Why couldn't you live with it? I'm the weakest goddamn link on this team, everybody fucking knows it! I just kind of know how to fire a gun and get lucky shots from time to time! I don't have a thing that I bring to make us better! (There are tears in the corners of Lance's eyes, but he's blinking fast, trying to hold them back.) 

 **Keith Kogane** : Can't you just think about what you're saying for two seconds before it comes out of your mouth? If it were just about firing a gun in the right direction or being a good pilot, then literally _anything_ else in the universe could replace us. Not just you - any of us. _All_ of us! You're practically our fucking glue, Lance - you brought us here, you keep us here, and you keep us together. You're even stupider than I thought if you thought the relationship dynamic around here could remain even fractionally as positive as it is without - (He pauses, suddenly choking on his words, before beginning to cough brutally, his face twisting in a result of a fresh bout of pain.)

 **Lance McClain** : (Lance immediately drops the bowl he's holding and rushes over, practically forgetting the entire last minute of conversation.) Fuck, fuck, _shit_...(He places a hand on Keith's shoulder, too afraid to do anything else.) Come on, Keith, stay with me, here. 

 **Keith Kogane** : (Keith brings both hands to cover his mouth, his throat shuddering dryly with every intake of air before he begins to cough again. When he speaks, his voice is wheezy and whistling, and he's using one hand to wipe tears that collected from the corners of his eyes.) I...I'm fine, Lance...Jus' got too excited. 

 **Lance McClain** : (Lance doesn't even hesitate before wrapping his arms around Keith, gently enough so that he's not actually squeezing him. He speaks into his shoulder.) Fucking hell, Keith, I thought you were dying right there. I was debating the pros and cons of screaming for Shiro and Allura. 

 **Keith Kogane** : Sorry. (His voice is still raspy, and he's still huffing out smaller coughs, trying to stifle them.) I'm okay, I'm okay...Jesus fuck. Wasn't dying,jus'... (He punctuates it with another cough.)

 **Lance McClain** : (Lance shushes him, and starts gently tracing circles on Keith's back with his thumbs, trying to calm him down.) Don't try to talk, just don't. Calm down a bit. You just have to breathe, okay? Focus on that. There's nothing else, just breathe. 

 **Keith Kogane** : (Keith nods, although now mute besides the coughs that made him bounce and shake are separated only by occasional bouts of just hardly controlled, shallow breaths. He straightens up, again wiping at his eyes, although this time with a slightly heightened sense of vigor.)

 **Lance McClain** : (Lance slowly stops tracing the circles on Keith's back as Keith straightens up, and lets go of him. He wipes away the tears that were still forming in the corners of his eyes as he too straightens, and looks Keith in the eyes, his face void of any emotion other than concern.) Okay...you alright?

 **Keith Kogane** : (He nods, taking one careful, slow breath beforehand. He face is as oddly stern as ever, an uncomfortable pair with the tears in his eyes.) I'm okay. I just couldn't breathe for a second, my chest just...it hurts, kind of. Sorry. 

 **Lance McClain** : It's okay...not your fault. (Lance stands up, walking back over and picking the bowl up off of the floor.) I think, uh...I think Hunk left the forks and stuff in the drawer right next to you, there. (He silently fills up the bowl, suddenly aware of the slightly awkward feeling that was filling up the room, the same kind that happens when you've been fighting with someone and you realize you can't leave the room once the fight's over.)


End file.
